Posted by Eric’sGirl on the Tubal Reversal Message Board
This THANK YOU! is long overdue. I had my TR one week ago! I have started and restarted this 100 times over in the past 7 days. I can’t find the words to say what I feel in my heart. The following is a mere fraction of the gratitude that Dr. Berger and all the wonderful nurses and staff at Chapel Hill Tubal Reversal Center deserve.
I found Dr. Berger’s website in March 2004. Life had thrown one hell of a twist my way. My high school sweetheart and I were reunited. I may have loved other men in my life, but never the way had I loved him. And he was back – a second chance to correct bad life decisions we made 10 years earlier.
In those “lost” 10 years I had met and had kids with a man – a man that was my best friend and my worst enemy. He changed me. I lost some of the personality traits that made me “me” while I was with him. And along the way, I opted for a TL – and asked a doctor to “cut and burn” my tubes instead of the clips he was going to use. I knew if I came home with clips I would only hear over and over again how I did that so I could leave him and start a new family with someone else. His post operative notes didn’t make much sense! So the first time I sent them into Dr. Berger, he told me my post op notes were ambiguous. I was told I could have the pre-screen laparoscopy to determine the true effect of my TL.
So that is where it sat until I got married in October 2006 and decided to start pursuing a TR more aggressively. In January 2007 I had an ovarian cyst and a wonderful local Ob/Gyn. My doctor told me we could wait 8 weeks for the cyst to resolve itself and do a follow-up ultrasound. I said I didn’t want to wait 8 weeks and risk a rupture – that I was considering a TR. He removed the cyst and took pictures so I could send them to Dr. Berger.
Those pictures put me in “marginal” candidate status. I am a smart woman, I but never looked into the numerous ways a TL can be performed. That doctor – the one that was recommending clips because I was so young (27 yrs old) – went on to remove all but 3-5 cm of my tubes and cauterize them right up to my uterus wall. No two ends for anastomosis… and possibly not enough tube left for implantation.
In 2004, I had sent my report to two other doctors – wasn’t as impressed with them from the start, but this time I was doing due diligence in the research phase. Again, I contacted the two other facilities. One took over a week to respond… and the other, the nurse on the phone wasn’t versed enough to understand the “implantation” option… or maybe they just didn’t perform it… or maybe not that often – I don’t know. All I know is neither had the support network that Dr. Berger and his staff provided.
I once sent an email over the weekend because I had time to send it then and wasn’t expecting an answer until Monday. It by no means was anything pressing. Dr. Berger himself responded shortly after I sent it!!!! Oh my goodness,that pushed me over the edge. It was followed shortly by a response by the nurse that was copied on it!
I have now been to Chapel Hill Tubal Reversal Center. I don’t know how they do it! Four consults and four surgeries each day, and somehow there is ALWAYS a prompt reply to every phone call and email. And the message board full of ladies who are saving to schedule, waiting for their day, or on the other side. You couldn’t ask for a better support system!
On Wednesday, October 17th I walked into CHTRC for my consult. What an amazing place to be! Nothing but professionalism from the second you walk in… until you walk back out. I hire people for our service company. I can’t believe the caliber of the staff Dr. Berger has assembled! It is not an easy feat to find that many people who put their heart and soul into their work and the cause!
On Wednesday, October 17th I met with Dr. Berger. I don’t know if I have ever been in the presence of such a gifted and caring individual. And I don’t know if I have ever been so shaken. He accepted me at my “marginal” candidacy – and I came face to face with that reality. I signed a surgical consent form that needed to be so vague – “bilateral tuboplasty” (plastic surgery of my tubes!) it read. I didn’t fit into either “standard” (anastomosis or implantation) procedure. I walked into that room knowing that there was no other person on this planet that could put me together. And with complete professionalism, he walked me through every reality and every possibility. I watched as he drew out what he MAY be able to do. I left struggling to hold onto the faith I had – IN HIM! I wanted a miracle out of him – how unfair of an expectation was that?!?! In fact, I even told him to write, “Dr. Berger is going to pull of a miracle tomorrow” on my surgical consent form – instead of “bilateral tuboplasty.”
My husband wasn’t there that day. He was in Cincinnati for work – flying in that night to be there for the surgery the next day. But I wasn’t alone. Dr. Berger’s network extends past the doors of CHTRC. Online I had my girls pulling for me from all over the world! And back at the hotel, I had Donna and her husband Bob. Donna was on my thread and had surgery the day of my consult. We hung out after her surgery and my consult, clear through my husband arriving at 9 o’clock that night. They kept my chin up. Without them I would have sat in my hotel room – crying until my husband got there. It was ALL OR NOTHING the next day.
So with my hopes and dream of babies with my high school sweetheart on the line, I walked back into CHTRC on Thursday, October 18th. I have never been so scared of an “answer,” and surgery never seemed so – well… refined and simple. There were no worries… they took such good care of you and kept you so comfortable! I almost forgot there was a chance this wouldn’t go well!
I remember telling me they were starting the anesthesia. I remember trying to wake up and ask the nurses what he did. I wasn’t the typical case. Dr. Berger had told them he wanted to explain things to me, so they weren’t able to say much. I remember someone telling me, “thumbs up!” I remember someone saying, “It’s good news!” I wasn’t catching their hints. Half loopy – and fully determined to get the answers I wanted. I guess I worried my recovery nurses. My husband later told me they came to get him and told him they had upset me.
Dr. Berger PULLED OFF A MIRACLE THAT DAY! He found my original passage through my uterine wall. He connected the minimal tube my TL doctor left behind. Dr. Berger sat in front of me and told me I had 4.0 cm on the right and 3.0 cm on the left. OH MY GOSH!!!! I wasn’t supposed to have much more than that in there!
And here is where I can’t explain what I feel inside… gratitude… hope… faith… yes! But they don’t come close to describing what it feels like to be whole again. What it feels like to be with my husband. What it feels like to make love and know I may be able to make a baby…. The old fashion way.
I don’t know how to say “thank you” for all that! I believe in always giving of yourself what you can give… you may never know when you will need to ask someone for something. I have never done something so great in my life for anyone – I don’t know how to pay this forward – I spin every time I try to fully grasp the impact he has had on our life.
Never have I been so amazed by anyone! I don’t know what made Dr. Berger dedicate himself to women and to families. He gives us so much – and there is nothing we give him! Or so I feel.
I have been on the boards long enough to know my same story is replayed time and time again by women who find Dr. Berger. What a gift he gives us by providing us the opportunity to undo our past!
I am sorry this is so long…
Dr. Berger, Sarah, Jan, Ericka, Jennifer, Julia, Rhonda, Pam, and Dr. Phlugrath – I remember each of you from that day or previous correspondences… and I know there were other surgical nurses and recovery nurses I was too hazy to acknowledge… please don’t feel I thank you any less!
THANK YOU! Thank you for caring so much…. Thank you for being the amazing people you are… Thank you for what you have given me… us… and our family!
May all your lives be as blessed as those you help!
Chrissy 34
Eric 35
TR 10-18-07
cconwell@charter.net
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